19 February 2008

The Yangtze Glitter

The child has a mind like a steel trap.

Last night, I ran a bath for her. While she was in her bedroom getting undressed, I tossed in a yellow tub tint tablet (because the yellow ones are never ever her choice - her choice is pink). She arrived to climb in and exclaimed "Look Mommy, it's the Yangtze River!"

I knew immediately why she'd said that, but it still floored me. We've got at least 100 books in rotation in her room - everything from baby board books to books that have more words than pictures. And one of them is The Story About Ping - about a little duck who lives on the Yangtze River, the yellow waters of the Yangtze River. We hadn't read Ping in a while, so for her to instantly conjure up the Yangtze out of the yellow waters of the bathtub was startling. I guess her little head isn't as cluttered up with as much randomness as mine is. [Like, why is the title The Story About Ping, and not The Story Of Ping?]

Recently, as I was cuddling her to sleep, she said to me, quietly and seriously: "Daddy said a bad word". "Honey, what'd he say?" "He said 'Fuckin' glitter'". It was one of those parenting moments where I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry. Yes, he probably did say that. Yes, the glitter comes home from school and gets everywhere. Yes, he shouldn't have said that bad word. Yes, glitter is evil and persistant. And yes, he has a propensity for using profanity where none is required, not to mention using more words than anyone ever needs to put in a sentence. [My favorite quote ever? The day he spilled a bottle of pills in the bathroom and yelled "Goddamn Fucking State of Affairs!"]

Maybe I should get some yellow glitter for the bathtub - we'll make the Yangtze Glitter!

27 comments:

MamaGeek said...

I love THAT. Me thinks you have a creative genius on your hands.

FreshHell said...

Oh my god, I'm laughing so hard right now. (On the inside; I'm at work and don't want to startle anyone.) That last curse is...I'm in awe. I am the Curse Mistress in our family (one of my three year old's first words was Damn. The other was F*$k. I am so proud!) but your husband really knows how to do it right!

Don Mills Diva said...

OMG - that is funny but also terrifying - I know we have start thinking about everything we say around our son or he's going to be able to blackmail us before he starts kindergarten...

Sober Briquette said...

Kids' retention and attention to detail is incredible. Surely studies have been done by smart-but-already-fading brains to understand and recapture this phenomenon. I bet puberty is when it all goes down river.

Life As I Know It said...

It is amazing the amount of information they can soak up so effortlessly.
I wish I had the memory my son has...

Nap Warden said...

Miss Peach loves The Story of Ping...Cute story!

Becky said...

What a smartie!

Eva said...

Oh what a great post!

Melanie said...

Ha! Fuckin' glitter, indeed. Or maybe he was talking about the film ?

In which case, the profanity was completely justified.

susan said...

This one made me laugh out loud!

Julia said...

I am not sure who made me laugh more-- Miss M, or daddy. State of affairs, though? Priceless.

And I know. Mine talks about things that happened a year or more ago thereby blowing my mind regularly. They are also observant little buggers, and remember things said, worn, cooked, etc. If only I could be sure she will use her powers for good, and not evil.... Bwahahaha

pinknest said...

yangtze river!! genius. i think yellow glitter would be divine..

nonlineargirl said...

Ping is why I know what she is talking about. For some reason that reminded me of a photo I have not seen in years - of my sister dressed as Ping one Halloween.

jen said...

i am adoring your husband right now. and you. and her. and glitter.

I AM VERY MARY said...

I laughed. I cried. I experienced your pain. Your joy. It was a moving experience, thank you. :)

Ozma said...

I love the way they absorb the world and make it all new again. I LOVED the story of Ping. That was one of my favorite books as a kid.

At some point I've got to post about this but I highly recommend Aesop's fables. At some point, your kid will start seeing fable motifs in things. Plus, they are awesome.

letitiah said...

I've got to start using, "goddamn fucking state of affairs"!!

LAS said...

This is so cute - I love this! My dad has always tended to swear a lot, more than necessary for sure and I definitely picked up on it. Once when I was 7 - the cat accidentally got out of the house - and the first thing out of my mouth was "OH SHIT!" My mother was pretty much horrified from then on at the way I would swear. Now I don't really anymore - but I've had to train myself not to.

She She said...

I hate fuckin' glitter, too. But Goddamn Fucking State of Affairs? Brilliant. I think you have two geniuses on your hands.

Hot Librarian said...

Note to self: stop swearing around baby.

Even if it WILL make for hilarious blog posting one day.

Julie Pippert said...

Brilliant child!

Funny story.

And you KNOW I have to tackle the preposition question.

Okay.

It's "about" because the book contains stories that are "intent upon" the character of Ping. In other words, the focus is about the character.

If they used "of" it would imply that the book was made from Ping, which would be, well, gross.

Point made?

nutmeg said...

I would get along well with your husband! My favorite movie line ever as of last week: ow, ow, fuckity ow! (Juno)

susiej.com said...

I love the state of affairs!!

MadMad said...

OK. So even your daughter is more intellectual than I... and your husband's swearing, too!

Victoria said...

Fuckin' glitter! LMAO!!

Smart one you have there (the book-remembering-child, not the glitter-cursing-child).

=)

alejna said...

That's very cool that she remembered the Yangtze River.

As for the swearing, I know that it's about time for it to come back and bite us in the ass. Our daughter has been reluctant to say much until lately. And now we find her repeating many-a-thing. I just hope we don't get her kicked out of daycare.

niobe said...

Everyone in your household is clearly absolutely brilliant.