04 May 2010

Highway Sights

I've seen some weird stuff on the highway recently.

Like, a car with balls. Yes, balls. As in testicles. As in, hanging from the rear bumper where a trailer hitch would be. I pointed it out to my husband; he noted that they were blue. He then pulled in behind the car while I tried to take a picture, which proved to be unnecessary, because they seem to be really easy to find on the intertubes. Who knew? I'd never seen a car with balls before. Are they more common in your neck of the woods?

Scarier, in addition to weird, was the day I was driving along on a crowded but moving parkway in the Bronx, when a pod of 12-15 bikers came up from behind, weaving through traffic, passed me and started POPPING WHEELIES. In traffic. On motorcycles. I was horrified.

I am completely unable to figure out the writerly transition from the wheelie poppers to the dead motorcyclist YouTube link that Barbara Card Atkinson posted last week, but they are related. Aren't they? Those Bronx bikers would surely like to be embalmed on their cycles when the end comes.

Seen anything weird on the highway recently?

20 comments:

Rima said...

I've seen the truck balls, too, but I figured it was just a midwest phenomenon.

FreshHell said...

I've seen those balls once but they don't seem to be a big thing down here. At least, not yet. Thank god.

I've only seen lots of dead wildlife on the road. Spring brings all manner of critters roaming where they shouldn't. Always sad to see dead foxes.

Awesome Mom said...

I have seen truck balls in Cali and I just figured that the driver was compensating for the fact that he was lacking in that department.

My boys would have loved to see the motorcycles popping wheelies.

Very Mary said...

Oh. The balls are hugely (he he he) popular here in Appalachia. Interestingly enough, last week my mom and I saw a Geo Tracker with its spare tire DUCT TAPED to the hatchback.

Harriet said...

Truck balls are a dime a dozen out here. My favorite road sight here is a local teen who's doctored his motorcycle helmet with brushes down the middle to look like a Hollywood idea of a centurion helmet. Cracks me up every time I see it. I want him to be a superhero.

peaceableimperatrix said...

It is absolutely not an Iowa thing (so I wouldn't say "midwest"). The first time I came across them was when we were driving through Ohio to get to DC a few years ago. I seem to recall we saw a bunch in Texas, too (but that isn't surprising, is it?)

And I've seen the blue ones, too -- what the heck is the owner thinking????

Kelly said...

Blue balls, huh? Guess he's stating his eternal frustration.

Stimey said...

I've seen the blue truck balls too and photographed them. It turns out they are a phenomenon known as "truck nuts."

I don't get it though.

Jody said...

Yeah, we see truck nuts every summer on road trips. Not so much right around home, but I'm not looking that closely, you know?

We saw a hatchback a few weeks ago with about 1/3rd of the roof covered in Lego. Someone had glued pieces all over the top.

The kids wanted to do the same to our minivan. They wanted to use the glued-on pieces as a base to build something.

Jennifer (ponderosa) said...

Road bike riders.

That's not really weird, but it's all I've got!

nonlineargirl said...

Sadly, no. I used to see the Zentra (a Sentra painted with zebra stripes, with a mane and tail) all the time, but the driver must have gotten a different job or started commuting at new hours.

kathy a. said...

today i saw an art car on the bridge. it wasn't one i know. this one had design work with glass beads and paint and so on, across the back and sides, and on the top -- a plush rabbit, and several birds rooting around. i think it was still a work in progress.

kathy a. said...

jody -- i used to see an art car called "mondrian car" all the time -- it was painted in that style, and later acquired a lego rooftop in the standard yellow, blue, black, red, white.

Kyla said...

Vehicle testicles are VERY common here and I haaaate them. I know testicles serve an important purpose in nature, but I don't find them to be aesthetically pleasing and don't want to be face to face with a pair at a stoplight or in traffic. ;)

Kyddryn said...

Truck balls abound here in Redneck Central. Joy.

I see many odd things on the highway, although lately it's chickens. You see, I live in a semi-rural area where many chickens are raised. They are then trucked into the city for processing. Somehow, some of them manage to find their way off the trucks, often at 70+ miles per hour. Most of them don't make the transition from 70 mph to flat stop very well. A few, however, emerge victorious from their battle with gravity and lurch bewildered into the woods where they'll probably be eaten by foxes after their short taste of sweet freedom.

Life is one big pageant, here. Whee.

Shade and Sweetwater,
K

phd in yogurtry said...

I was behind a vehicle with balls just yesterday. I was thinking, "man, he's got balls"

Aunt Becky said...

I keep threatening The Daver with a set of those.

painted maypole said...

when we first moved to the south i saw them all the time. they seem to have gone out of "style" (ack!) down here, although I did just see a pair the other day.

what kind of @sshole hangs a pair of fake testicles from his vehicle. Really disturbing. Even more so than all the Sarah! stickers I see on a regular basis.

Very Mary said...

Yesterday I espied a rubber ducky as a hood ornament. Refreshingly clever!

abby said...

the hubby saw a bag of dog poop hanging from the back of a truck one morning with the girls. now every time they get to that same intersection, HD asks where the poop truck is.

and the balls. hate em. the only trucks we see them on here are also adorned with military and/or hunting stickers. hmm...