21 January 2012

Exploitation, or, Blog Posts Written By Children

I'm probably a very bad mother, very bad indeed. I mean, last year, when my iPhone was clearly on its last legs, I replaced it with a new one and gave the old one to the kid. It's not got phone service, and its battery life is farshtinkener, but it does connect to the internet via wi-fi (at home) and she can use it as an iPod and play all manner of zombie games and send emails to her friends and take picture of the cats and make lists.

After she fell asleep clutching it in her hot little hands last night, I read all of her emails, looked at all of her pictures, and reviewed her "notes". She is one funny thing.  

Email to me and Daddy:

Subject: Periced Ears

Dear Mom & Dad,

I think it is very,very unfair that I am not allowed to get Periced Ears. I will buy my own my earrings and NEVER EVER complain about dinner. And I bet they will hurt about as much as my clip-on earrings. So PLEASE,PLEASE say yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Email to a friend, about a sleepover they've got planned for next weekend:
Subject: Sleep Over

Here are 9 things we could do at the Sleep Over.
1.Go on Webkinz.com
2.Watch Comedy Movies
3.Torcher George
4.Play with Barbies
5.Play Dress-Up
6.Plan Money-Saving for Goth Girlz
7.Play with American Girl Dolls
8.Play Beauty Salon(With real Make-Up
9.Play Super Model  
Notes to herself (version as of last night):
1.To have 12 inches of snow
2.To get my ears pierced
3.To have a really good singing voice  
 Notes to herself (updated sometime this morning):
1.To have 12 inches of snow
It happened!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2.To get my ears pierced
Not yet!!!!BOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3.To have a really good singing voice
It is half-way their!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One of an endless series of pictures of cats up in the ceiling of the cellar:

(In case you are wondering, we did not get 12" of snow - it was more like 6". I'm happy that she figured out how to spell "pierced" - I'd corrected her after she sent that first email to us. Of course, she spelled "torture" and "there" wrong. One step forward, two steps back. However, torcher/torture is kind of a nice homophone.)


Mayberry said...

My girl texts with her cousin and I sometimes check what they've been writing. What I want to know is how they picked up the texting shorthand already!

S said...

She is a riot.

Stimey said...

I have to admit that I feel a little bit sorry for George.

Bibliomama said...

I actually think 'torcher' is a better spelling. I'm considering adopting it from now on.

Tracie Nall said...

I was trying to correct my daughter's spelling the other day and found myself covertly typing it wrong just so the computer spell check could show me how to spell it correctly. Clearly I have some spelling issues.

Kyla said...

Both of mine have old iPhones (no service) and every time KayTar announces it I feel so extravagant and mildly embarrassed. BUT both phones were given to us free of charge in a broken state and Josh was able to repair them easily. We both have smartphones with service, so they work excellently as free iPods for the kiddos.

I recently set up KayTar's email account on hers and she spent the rest of the evening sending me random emails, like, "I'm going to the kitchen now." or "Why haven't you written me back yet?" LOL. I figure it helps her to practice her spelling and punctuation, at least.

V-Grrrl @ Compost Studios said...

(Secretly hoping you let her get her ears pierced.)

: )

shrink on the couch said...

You can your girl that my twins are 13 and not yet allowed to pierce their ears yet. I'm going to cave soon enough but I've told them 16. They are beside themselves. Heh. Just tonight they were pressuring me to cave in. I act stoic and unrelenting but I am going to soften any day now.

snozma said...

I am very familiar with this intense sense of urgency.

My kid GOT her ears pierced as a baby. Then she hated those damn earrings, pulled them out and one closed up. She won't even consider them now!

That sounds like a fun evening by the way. Did she manage to fit in all that stuff?

painted maypole said...

the cat in the rafter is classic. and her wish list -with updates - is priceless