07 November 2014

Madness Lies This Way

I don't like loose ends. I hate it when things don't get resolved, I like everything in its place (although the clutter in my house might not lead you to think so). And when I respond to your PR pitch with a genuine question, I want an answer.

Last night, I was tidying up my email, in which "tidying up" equals "delete delete delete", as one does. In the morass I found a pitch from a PR company, flogging a GPS pet tracker, "that is perfect for your holiday or stocking stuffer gift guide" (like I have such a thing). If Fluffy runs out of the "safe zone", "you will receive an instant text message or email with a live-GPS tracking map to assist you finding your dog/pet immediately". Not only that, the thing acts like a combination FitBit/NannyCam for your dog: "this technology will showcase when your pet is getting exercise...and really let you know if your pet is getting enough exercise on a daily, weekly or monthly basis. Also, if you have a dog walker--you can really monitor if your dog is getting enough exercise via this technology."

[Insert eyeroll]

I had, in September when I got this email, responded to the PR flack:

What happens to the GPS if the pet is eaten by a coyote? This a serious question, BTW. Lots of coyotes in my area.

And I have had no response to date.

I imagine that when the coyote (wolf, bear, lion) eats the tracked pet, the tracker ends up in the coyote (wolf, bear, lion). And then, we get a ping that the pet has crossed the line, so we start following the GPS tracking map on the trail of Fluffy, and OOPS, end up in the lion's den. Somehow, this seems like a misguided application of GPS technology. Or not, whatev.

But why didn't the PR flack answer my question?


slow panic said...

When people say "I just have to buy a few more stocking stuffers" I just stare at them like they are speaking a foreign language.

Also, I'm always amazed that retailers push super expensive gifts as stocking stuffers.

Also I'm pretty sure there is a big trash can in internets/cyber universe where response emails to PR/sales emails go to die. They forgot some of us actually might be thinking.

Bibliomama said...

I have, in fact, said "I just have to buy a few more stocking stuffers" in the past, JODI, :), but I'm referring to socks and underwear and gum, not an effing GPS pet-tracker (which, oddly, I heard about for the first time last night when a friend was talking about people having them on hunting dogs - holy Bader-Meinhof situation). And yeah, dammit, I WANT TO KNOW.

On the loose ends thing, when Angus was little he had this dump truck that had six shapes that fit into holes in its side. The purple rectangle got lost at one point and it destroyed my soul putting the thing away every night one shape short. Then it mysteriously showed up again, months later. Still bugs me.